Wearying the Worship Leader - part 3

PLEASE READ PART 1 & Part 2 before reading the following story...

"Mr. Joe?" A teenager had forced her way through the crowd of complainers. Eventually, her parents found her and stood by her side.

"Mr. Joe, we just wanted to tell you how much we love and appreciate you. Last week, I was on the edge of making a bad decision..." Joe noticed a tear form in the corner of her father's eye. "I was lonely." The teenager continued. "I didn't feel I had a friend in the world. To make a long story short, I went to the bathroom and found some pills. I could almost hear the voices in my head saying, no one cares.. no one cares... But then... " she paused, staring in the distance as if she was watching her life on a movie screen. A weak and pained smile began to form on her space. "Then I began to hear something else... a song in my heart... 'who am I that you are mindful of me, that you hear me when I call?' I recognized it. It was that Friend of God song you like so much that you sing over and over."

RJ, still smirking and giggling under a nearby pew, noticed something. What? Suddenly, he realized that something in the tone of the voices had changed. What was going on? He opened his eyes only to find himself surrounded by lots of bare and sandaled feet. He peeked out from under the pew and was startled by an entire squad of armed, smiling angels; and every tip of every sword was pointed at him. "Don't move." charged the lead angel. RJ didn't move. But he could hear. And what he heard was weeks of work wearing down this worship leader going down the toilet!

"I started singing," she continued..."the only part I could really remember... I am a friend of God... He calls me friend. And I started to cry so I sung it again... and again and again for over an hour. When my parents came home, they found me lying on the floor of my room, crying and singing with a spilled bottle of pills to the left of me. I had realized that I had a friend and that He loved me. So I asked him to make the words real to me. To be my friend. To come into my heart. And He did. I'm different.. changed. I sometimes still feel the loneliness, but I know that He is there. I just had to say... thank you."

The parents and teenager moved closer and wrapped their arms around the worship leader. He could feel himself breaking. He felt the tears fall, not just theirs, but his as well. He felt the discouragement began to drain from him with one that fell. Sensing the need, each member of the congregation made their way to Joe and the family until a large huddle of compassion and encouragement had formed in the center of the room.

The lead angel smiled at RJ. "I'm guessing that this wasn't part of your plan?" RJ just glared back at him and hissed.

"Why do you guys always show up? I almost had him! He would have been bitter! Quit the ministry! Stopped doing music. Blamed the church! It would have been a glorious victory." RJ's shoulders drooped. "But instead I've suffered this horribly ignoble defeat at your hands!" In response, all the angels began laughing! "What's so funny?"

"You weren't defeated by us!"

"Oh really," RJ started to stand but was immediately met by a huge gleaming angel with a extremely powerful looking broadsword daringly pointed at his face. "Well then, tell me what defeated me? What had the power to dismantle all of my carefully made plans? I had him! I had him! How could I lose when I was so close?"

The angels all glance over their shoulders at the tearful crowd holding the young teenage girl, her family and the once discouraged worship leader. "Simple, John. You were defeated by a kind word... spoken in due season." He smiles at the young teenager..." And a child shall lead them..."

The End?

Wearying the Worship Leader - part 2

PLEASE START BY READING PART 1

"Young man!!!! Young man!!!! " Joe groaned as she rushed to him, stopping nearly nose to nose. "That music was too loud, too fast and too new."

"Hello, Mrs. Edmonton." Joe forced a smile. "Was there a problem with the service today?"

"Where did you get those songs? I didn't know a single one of them!"

"Well, we did sing one of them last week. And the others are part of our regular worship repeto..."

"I didn't know any of them! What happened to the songs we sang when Peterson was worship leader here? He always sang stuff I liked. And I only like songs I already know, son. Worship should be like a warm blanket, cozy and familiar. Stop singing those new songs and 'give me that old time religion!'

He wanted to laugh. He had met Peterson. And he knew that she had felt the same way when Peterson led worship services. He warned Joe about her. "But ma'am, the scripture says to sing a new song..."

"Don't be talking doctrine to me. I don't care about all that. I can't feel doctrine! And I can't feel the spirit when you do those new songs. Those old songs are like..."

"... A warm blanket... yes ma'am, I know." She stormed away, leaving Joe even more frustrated than before. He thought about Joshua, Moses and the children of Israel. How long till this generation passes away?

RJ liked that thought. He wished he had thought of saying it himself. But it was just further evidence that the discouragement was starting to have the desired effect. "Joe actually had that thought with no help from me! Excellent! He is definitely becoming infected."

RJ ushered more parishioners towards Joe. "No, ma'am, I didn't realize the music was so loud. Yes sir, I do check out these songs in scripture. Yes, I like hymns, and we do do them from time to time. No, we can't turn the guitars up louder and rock the house..."

Rolling on the floor, RJ couldn't help laughing with delight. Soon Joe would be covered and stuck in the muck and the mire of discontent from others. Then he'll carry that frustration and pain home and pour it on his wife and kids until the entire situation... stinks. What a beautiful setup!

"My name is RJ," he giggled to himself, "And I specialize in spreading crap. And at this rate, this guys walk with the Lord will be in the toilet. He'll be so mad at the congregation, that he won't want to lead them in worship. Or if he does, he will do it with resentment, anger and frustration. That will transfer across the spiritual connection, to the worship team, the church, his family.... And if I can do this just right, I might even be able to get him to fuss and yell at the congregation for "not worshipping right!" and rush the resentment along like the roaring rapids of a river! What a glorious day!"

RJ couldn't help himself! He began to sing his favorite song "dun dun dun...another one bitest the dust". He tried to catch his breath and wipe away the tears. He took a moment to close his eyes and bask in the soon-to-come praise he would receive from his fellow discouragers. And that is probably why he never saw it coming.

To Be Continued in Part 3

Wearying the Worship Leader - Part 1


Rambling John, demonic Head of the Department of Gossip, Slander and Discouragement Division of WAC (Whiners And Complainers) loved his nickname. Originally named John Toadstool, he began ascending (descending?) the ladder of power at WAC after his success in a large regional religious organization brought his skills to the attention of various agency directors. His ruthlessness and efficiency eventually earned him the moniker "Rambling John" because, like an overflowing port-a-potty rocking on the back of a flatbed trailer, he was good at taking other people's crap and throwing it everywhere.

He was still basking in the glow of last weeks accomplishments in Big "D" Texas. Playing on the weakness of several parishioners, he had managed to drive a pastor into early retirement. Think of it, all that wisdom and experience out on a fishing boat in the gulf instead of in the church watering the immature. Wonderful!

This time RJ had picked a juicy target for his discouragement tactics; an unsuspecting worship leader named Joe. Already depressed, Joe wasn't sure how the service had gone this Sunday. Things seemed rough, the musicians weren't "on" and the song selection did not seem to be well received. And on top of all that, he had broken a guitar string... in each of their two services. RJ slithered up next to Joe and sat down. He whispered a few phrases in the worship leader's ear that he had been saving from last week with the pastor. That was all Joe needed. "Aw man", Joe sighed. "I can't believe how badly that turned out."

RJ loved this part. Well meaning, worship leader, so sure that he had blown it. The guy didn't understand the danger of judging something spiritual with natural emotions. "I know what you mean." RJ smiled. "I can't believe those people wouldn't clap their hand to that new song. Did they seem a bit unspiritual to you today?"

"Sure did!" Joe's head sunk lower. "It's like they couldn't feel the spirit moving! Maybe, I need to seek the Lord..."

"Why?" RJ countered quickly. "You know that it happens like this. They get up and come to church and let things like family and breakfast get in the way of their spirituality and worship. What's wrong with those people?" RJ signaled to a friend across the room who hurriedly shoved an old lady in Joe's direction. Responding to the nudge, she began to pick up steam and as she made her way to Joe, her finger outstretched, her wig waving in the wind.

To Be Continued in Part 2