Suddenly Susan - Part 7 - The Final Chapter: Sleep Sound Susan

Note: Rambling John is the demonic Head of the Department of Gossip, Slander and Discouragement Division of WAC (Whiners And Complainers).

Continued from Chapter 6...

"Now!" Merth drew his sword and raced towards Michael... RJ, however, made a dash for the wall. It was just like RJ had planned it. After all, he is one of the top deceivers. Why in the world would anyone believe him?

He didn't look back to see the obvious battle that was about to ensue, but he heard the screams of the young discourager's last brief stand. "Serves him right", RJ thought. "Botching an easy job like that."

Maybe if he had attacked alongside Merth, they may have at least driven Michael off, but why take the chance? RJ had places to go, people to deceive. Freewill to exploit!

To the average passerby, the sky was clearing and the night was falling. But Rambling John could see the battle going on in the heavens. The old lady next door had called down some heavy fire power. I mean, Michael? She had archangel prayers. That's someone to stay away from.

RJ ran a few blocks, trying to draw no attention to himself. Then, flexing his membranous wings, he ripped into the sky like a rocket. Angels and demons alike paused for a moment, impressed with the speed of his departure. A few of the demons, however, got the hint and immediately followed suit. This was not a battle to be won. Still RJ, knew that there would come a major battle someday, and then there would be no place to hide.

As he disappeared into the air, Michael stared for a moment and then turned back to Susan. Calcon, another chief angel, entered the room, landing beside him. "They've been routed, sir. Other than those who have the right to stay, the forces en masse have been turned away."

"Good." Michael said softly. "Did RJ get away?"

"Doesn't he always? Such a coward. I can't wait till I get my hands on him someday."

"Don't underestimate the power of deception, Calcon. And RJ is one of the best. Even angels have fallen from his words. And as for his power, it grows everyday." Michael couldn't help but smile. "I will, however, be amused one day when he finds out what we did today. You'd think he'd know by now there's no such thing as a "chance meeting". I'm just glad that old Miss Parker really does listen to us."

"How did you work that out?"

"Well, she was singing some of the hymn favorites. So when she sang Precious Lord, Evangeline (you know her, right? She's really good at what she does.) Anyway Evangeline 'suggested' that she really should let the Lord lead her right then. So Miss Parker asked the Lord what he wanted her to do. Evangeline used a slight breeze to switch the pages in her hymnal to a different song. 'I Come to the Garden alone..."

Laughing, "So that's why she was outside gardening?"

"Yes. It made her realize she needed to do some gardening which put her out there just about the time we expected Susan and Merth to come trudging by. The rest just played itself out. We knew when trials and troubles come her way, the old lady would pray. And we would have access to this situation."

"So we made her go outside to confront..."

Michael looked at Calcon disapprovingly. "We don't make... we suggest. Demons possess people and take over their free will through deception. We suggest but leave obedience of that suggestion up to their own free will. They can choose to work with us or not."

"Either way, this was excellent! I guess it's time to go. We can let the guardians handle the rest of this, right?"

Michael turned back to Susan who had climbed into her bed and dozed off. A small breeze pushed its way through the crack in her window, which Michael then used to softly brush the hair back from her tear stained face. "No, the battle is far from over. But I think I'll just sit here awhile and watch over her tonight. She's been through so much. I can see the echoes of a great destiny. It moves me. I think I will stay."

Calcon shrugged his confusion and then was gone. Michael continued to stare at the young girl and then turned his gaze to the sky beyond the ceiling. "Master, after so many left your side in heaven, I asked you then, was it worth the price of free will. And You said, it was. Now as I sit here beholding innocence scarred and twisted by the enemy, I think I am beginning to understand." He blinked back a tear and leaned against the wall next to the bed. "Sleep sound, young Susan. For tonight, you are under my protection and under my wings. And the gates of hell will not prevail against me."

REWRITE - Suddenly Susan - Part 6 - The Chains - 3rd person past tense

(Author's note: Ok, I think I prefer this in third person past tense writing.)

"What are you doing?!" Merth rushed towards RJ as RJ moved slowly towards Susan with sword drawn. "She's mine!" Merth screamed, wrapping his talons around RJ's arm.

Merth didn't see the muscles tense. He didn't notice the arm move or see the swing. But he felt the slap as his body lifted off the floor and flew helplessly across the room, tumbling through the bookshelves on the west wall and onto the wet grass outside. Immediately springing to his feet, Merth launched back into the room, only to find himself suddenly struggling, suspended in air as RJ's scaly talons tightenend around his throat.

"You idiot!" RJ hissed. "You low level discouragers always make the same mistakes. She is not yours. She belongs to nobody until she breathes her last breath. You overconfident little slug. She is not yours until she cannot choose to be anyone else's." RJ watched Merth's eyes bulge as his body dangled at the end of his grip.

"So are YOU going to kill her?" Merth wheezed and whined. "She's my kill! She's my kill! I want the credit!"

Disgust. That's all RJ could feel. No sympathy. No pity for lack of experience. Just a growing vile river of disgust. Better to do away with this incompetent tempter before he did anymore damage... But, no. The master may have need of him.

Tossing Merth to the floor, he turned his gaze back to the once weeping teenager.

"I'm not going to kill her. I don't have that kind of power and neither do you." A wise demon knows his limitations.

"Then what?"

RJ's slowly lifted his heavy sword over his head and then let it fall toward Susan! It pierced her flesh, but she never knew it. It sliced her from head to toe, but the sobbing figure on the floor never flinched. He stepped back to survey his work.

"No!!!" Merth stumbled forward in shock! "What are you doing?"

"Probably saving both of our lives." Shattered links and chains littered the area around her. RJ knelt and inspected one of the pieces closest to him. Not really heavy, but enough to hold a know-it-all teenager. He was angry, beyond angry. This should have been a victory! He could usually salvage a situation like this one. Not today, though. What was that old saying? Those who fight and run away... His thoughts were interrupted as a chilling howl to his right signaled that the war had finally reached them.

"Back away from the girl." He doesn't even look. He didn't have to. RJ recognized the angelic stench long before the voice made it's presence known. "You heard me, John!"

"It's RJ, Mikey. I told you before to call me RJ."

"And it's Michael. I said to never call me Mikey"

How many times had they played this scene? He loved getting under Michael's skin. And he knew just how to do it. RJ has mastered the art of smiling and sneering at the same time. He practiced it whenever he could stand to look at himself in the mirror. Now it was one of his signatures moves. He called it smeering. It was soooo satisfyingly irritating to others. "So, my friend, long time no see. You're looking good. it's been at least a decade or so." RJ "smeered" again as Michael flinched almost imperceptibly. The most bitter enemy is the one you once called friend. He laughs to himself. Michael was a great angel of war. RJ was sure he almost converted him at the time of the great uprising. Oh well. Too late for Mikey now.

Where was Merth? Oh! There he is! Cowering in the corner like a frightened puppy. Cretin! Dolt! Idiot! Putrid lump of stupidity. As long as he kept his mouth shut, they would be ok. But when has RJ ever known a tempter to be able to keep his mouth shut!?

"Let her go!" Michael jabbed his sword towards RJ's neck.

"Uh, let who go? The girl? What are you talking about, we don't have the girl." Merth began to say something, so RJ kicked him in the face. Simple. Direct. And sooo fun. He watched as Michael stared at the figure crumpled on the floor. "That's it..." he says to himself. "...Go examine her closely."

Keeping his sword outstretched towards the two demons, Michael moved slowly around the room, keeping his back to the wall, until he finally reached Susan. Confused, he noticed the broken chain pieces strewn around the girl. But as he knelt to examine the broken links, RJ made eye contact with Merth and mouthed a few words of instruction... Merth nodded his understanding. On my count, Merth. Not a second before... One, two, three.

"Now!"